A Process

My grapes certainly don't look like this at this time of year.  There isn't too much that is green right now except maybe my house.  The dominant colour right now is white.  This is a period of dormancy and in the spring everything will come to life once again and start a new growth cycle.  Nature operates in cycles and I think that is true of myself.  But the stage in my cycle seems to be lasting a long time.  I have spent months in self-reflection and introspection.  I do feel urges to come out of that hibernation but it is a slow process.  There have been periods in my life that were more extroverted and outgoing.  But every so often I have to take a step back and examine where I am at in life and make corrections and look for answers to questions that I haven't even formulated.  It can get frustrating.  At times I feel stuck in one spot, spinning my wheels.  At other times I feel like everything is as it should be in the world and a feeling of peace and contentment washes over me.  It seems that when I am trying to force things, things are difficult and I come up against a wall.  If I relax, then I feel that answers will come in their own good time and will be better than anything I could ever imagine.  One thing about me is that when I am retrospective, I can never imagine doing anything differently and that what happened provided me the lessons that I really needed.  I just need to surrender to the process.